On my way to Salt Lake City for a convention, I had a layover in San Francisco. Don’t ask me why United Airlines didn’t send me straight to Salt Lake City from Seattle (the way I’ve always gotten there), but at least it gave me extra time to meet people. The flight from Seattle to San Francisco was a very productive one. I met an incredibly nice person who also became a customer.
During the 2 hour flight, she did the majority of the talking. In between her pauses, I would only ask her more questions. She answered away, and then waited for my next one. She loved it! After the flight, she gave me a big hug, and even though she did all of the talking, told me that I was one of the nicest, most interesting people that she has ever met.
I could have just sat back, relaxed, listened to my personal development CD’s on my MP3 Player, but instead I sat there listening, using the SOFTNER Technique. Because I only spoke for about 10% of the time, and even that was just asking questions, she sensed that I had a sincere interest in her. Also, people very seldom have the opportunity to just talk about themselves, something everyone loves to do. I found out about her family life, her childhood, why she chose her line of work, you get the idea.
I was able to create a strong connection by just asking questions and listening to her using the SOFTNER Technique. The next time you find yourself in a similar situation, take a step back, and just ask questions. You may realize that you have very little patience and get easily bored around conversations that aren’t centered around you.